presence

Illustrations © Barbara J Holzapfel

I'm wondering if one of the major reasons our society resists the inevitable conversation about death isn't simply because we don't know what to say. Not only are we be dealing with our own state of anxiety, but we will also be concerned for our loved one's tender feelings. Fear of saying the wrong thing may leave you or your loved one lost for words.. and that's okay. Perhaps the greatest gift you can give is the gift of your presence. Simple activities like watching a movie, or playing cards can feel reassuring in the company of a loved one.

My father always said, "Silence is golden". I believe this expression fits perfectly when applied to living with dying. Sometimes finding the appropriate words just complicate the way of compassionate support. Your simple presence will say to your friend.. I am willing to walk this most difficult path with you, whatever may come.